Time for a Sleep Divorce?

A lot of stress in life comes from only seeing one side of the story.

According to the American Academy of Sleep Science, over a third of Americans are opting for a sleep divorce.” Should you?

Whether it’s to avoid a partners constant snoring, different preferences in sleep temperatures and bedding, or waking up because of a restless sleeper, many people are choosing separate rooms to improve their sleep.

Nearly half (43%) of millennials sometimes or regularly choose to sleep in a different room to adapt to their sleeping partner's needs. This trend is observed in one-third (33%) of Generation X individuals, followed by 28% of Generation Z and 22% of baby boomers.

But is this the right decision for your relationship?

Poor sleep can harm your health, worsen your mood, and lead to lower job satisfaction. Also, research demonstrates that partners who experience short sleep durations are more likely to interact in a more hostile way when one partner sleeps more. Finally, poor sleep quality decreases emotional intelligence, which is vital for maintaining healthy work and domestic relationships.

However, for many, going to bed with their partner is a time where relationships are deepened through intimate conversations and quality time free from distractions. A sleep divorce, managed improperly, could drive a wedge in a relationship, resulting in a fractured relationship.

First, if you partner snores frequently, this could be the result of obstructive sleep apnea. Obstructive sleep apnea is a serious medical condition that can lead to a myriad of health issues. It may be time for them to see their physician if you observe the following:

  1. Loud snoring that disturbs your sleep.

  2. Pauses in breathing.

  3. Your partner waking up gasping for breath or choking.

  4. Excessive daytime drowsiness.

Next, work with your partner to create the conditions for restful and fulfilling sleep. This is often referred to as sleep hygiene.

  1. Make your room cold, dark, and quiet, like a cave.

  2. Avoid caffeine consumption after 2pm, especially if you are caffeine sensitive.

  3. Avoid evening alcohol consumption, as alcohol fractures sleep and reduces sleep quality.

If these tactics don't lead to a restful sleep environment, you may need to consider separate sleeping conditions. This involves having an open discussion about the importance of sleep without compromising intimacy, and planning alternative ways to strengthen your relationship.

A lot of stress in life comes from only seeing one side of the story.

Our incomplete view of the world narrows our focus and sends us spiraling out of control as we latch onto a single fact about a situation, and our minds run wild.

Maybe it's just me, but I find this to be a significant source of my anxiety. My lack of perspective generates internal tension that benefits neither me nor the people I care about.

I heard a quote recently from A.W. Tozer that absolutely blew my mind, and brought my attention to this glaring issue.

It’s about the relationship between a hammer and nail.

“The hammer is a useful tool. But the nail, if it had feeling and intelligence, could present another side of the story. For the nail knows the hammer only as an opponent; a brutal, merciless enemy who lives to pound it into submission, to beat it down out of sight and clinch it into place.”

A.W. Tozer

The nail views the hammer solely as its adversary. It fails to realize that without the hammer, and the uncomfortable force it exerts on the nail, the nail would serve no purpose. It would simply be a sharp instrument left in a drawer or on the floor, waiting to pierce the foot of an unsuspecting victim.

However, when a skillful craftsman correctly positions the nail, it can act as the anchor for a beautiful piece of furniture, help keep rain out of a home, or hang a piece of artwork that brings joy.

So, the next time you feel like the nail, remember that life's hammer is necessary for you to be useful and fulfill your purpose. Step back. Seek silence and try to gain perspective on your situation.

Your situation could be precisely what you need for a new level of growth.

Our indoor and sedentary lifestyles often prevent us from receiving the healing and life-giving benefits of the sun.

Moderate sun exposure assists the skin in producing vitamin D, which is essential for strong bones and a robust immune system. Sun exposure is linked to improvements in mood, cognitive function, and sleep quality by regulating circadian rhythms.

It may also reduce the risks of certain types of cancer. Interestingly, one study even found that spending more time in the sun correlates with lower all-cause mortality.

Sun exposure plays a crucial role in optimizing vitamin D levels. Ideally, you should aim for at least 15-20 minutes of sun exposure per day with uncovered skin. Fair complexions generate vitamin D faster than darker ones, so if you have fair skin, consider using sunscreen.

Yours in Wellness,

TELL YOUR FRIENDS. HELP ADAPTATION GROW.

Don't keep it to yourself, share Adaptation now.